VI. Love

An Eternal Career, by Frank and Lydia Hammer, [1947], at sacred-texts.com

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VI

LOVE

Love is the highest vibration of all, and covers all our relations with our fellowmen. Love is the most important law in the universe, and he who is in harmony with this law will be in harmony with all of the others. It is the transgression of the law of love which causes all evil.

Love is the great force to which all men are subject, and is more vital and powerful than electricity. Love is the life of man, for without love, life is mere existence. Every soul, without exception, craves love and affection and atrophies for lack of it. To love and to be loved makes life worthwhile.

Love is the essence of Divine Nature, and since love is the nature of God, it must be the nature of man in a correspondingly lesser degree, for man is created in His image.

Human love, which is a reflection of Divine Love passes through three stages. The first stage is selfish;

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only the "I" is considered; one's own satisfaction, pleasures, desires and comfort. It is the taking, not the giving stage; an elementary expression of love, much too common.

The second stage of love is mutual, give and take, or sharing of love. Each lover considers the other's happiness, wishes and welfare. This type of love is a much higher manifestation than the first and becomes more prevalent as man develops.

The third stage of love is selfless; it asks nothing in return. The only desire of this type of love is to serve and to worship the adored one. Needless to say few have reached this high plane of selfless, spiritual love.

Since love is manifested chiefly in the first stage, one sees a constant misuse of the term. It is employed by many people to designate a liking for articles, a fondness for foods and drinks, an attachment for places and things. Love, however, in its highest sense can only be properly used to denote affection between individuals. Love expresses something spiritual, and as such can have no connection with objects that minister solely to the senses.

The word love should never be employed to express animal passion, desire or appetite, for it has no relationship to these. Nor is it applicable to the affairs of sensual and licentious men and women which hold the daily front page with lewd and unsavory details. Such people understand neither love nor marriage; they know only lust and mating.

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Worse still, are the periodicals which use love as a euphemism for lust, telling us that murder and heinous crimes are committed for "love." There are no crimes of love but only crimes of lust. The demons of lust and murder are twin brothers and follow in each other's tracks.

Nor is progressive polygamy to be confounded with the pure and permanent tie of holy matrimony. People do not marry for practical considerations such as money, security, in order to advance their social or material opportunities. Those who do so, sell themselves. Love is based on mutual respect and consideration, without which a relationship is mere possessiveness, not to be mentioned in the same breath as love.

Jealousy is no ingredient of love although many assume it is. Jealousy emanates from self-love only. One who truly loves has no thought of rewards; the only desire is the happiness of the beloved. Happiness is rarely possible with a selfish or jealous individual. Almost any vices are preferable to these, and most others are more easily overcome.

Love is an intense and absorbing emotion. It draws one toward a particular person and causes one to appreciate and delight in that person, and to crave the presence of the beloved. There is a desire to please and to benefit the beloved, and to advance his happiness and welfare. If we love we must give.

"How can I know if it is really love," the young and many no longer young, often ask. They have been mistaken before and now wish to be certain

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that this time it is love, and not temporary infatuation or merely physical attraction. There is one sure test. How much will you give of yourself, and he or she for you? Love never counts the cost. Many Anthonys and Cleopatras have considered the world well lost for love.

Many people are so niggardly with their affections and then complain that they are not loved. Whose is the fault? The unloved and unloving individual. Love begets love, and love attracts love. Love is the mainspring of life and he who loves the most lives the most. This is certain; humanity has no love for people who have no love for them.

There is, however, nothing possible to do if one's love is not reciprocated. It is utterly impossible to compel love. Resorting to vicarious means,—charms, trickery or sensual appeal accomplishes naught. Artificial tricks may produce temporary passional attraction, but not permanent sentiment.

If our love is unrequited, are we any poorer for having loved? Quite the contrary, for loving enriches and does not impoverish us. As the old friar told Evangeline when she told him of her wasted affection:

"Talk not of wasted affection, affection never was wasted;
 If it enrich not the heart of another, its waters returning
 Back to their springs, like the rain,
 shall fill them full of refreshment; p. 65
 That which the fountain sends forth returns again to the fountain."

Love's supply is inexhaustible and one can never become bankrupt by loving. Parents with one child feel confident they have lavished all their love upon it; but when they have others, they discover they are capable of loving them all equally as much.

"Love your enemies" is the soundest advice ever given to man, yet of the Master's injunctions this one seems the most difficult to obey. But what other solution have we to overcome the enemy? With force or revenge one places himself on a level with his opponent. For the time being you are no better than he, however much he may be guilty and you the innocent party. Moreover hate intensifies the vibration while love nullifies it.

When you hate a man you are bound to him with bonds stronger than steel. Consequently nothing is so foolish as to hate another, for the hater is getting the worst of it. So, if only for your own peace of mind love your enemies; in no other way can you ever be free from them.

Loving people does not mean that you must love all persons to the same degree. Even Jesus had his favorite disciple, the one he preferred above all. But loving does mean that we can be kind, understanding and sympathetic, and love people in a Platonic sense, which is a beautiful manifestation of spirit. Moreover, it is easy to love the good or God which is in all men.

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"Love is blind," that is what is claimed in an old proverb. Is it true that one who loves is incapable of seeing defects and faults in a beloved, which are apparent to friends and relatives? Love is not blind; love is the clarifier. No one is so blind as one who hates; one who can see only people's faults and weaknesses. Moreover, love stimulates the development of latent capacities for good, and one becomes better and nobler for having truly loved, or having been the recipient of an unselfish and pure affection.

Why do we love certain people? For their admirable traits, excellencies of character, or sterling values? Often the opposite is true. We love them despite their shortcomings and defects. We love them for some characteristic, or peculiarity, for their wit, or perhaps charm, friendly manner or kind heart. In other words we love people for themselves; because they are as they are, and we would not change them if we could.

One can never give a logical reason for love; when love ascends the throne reason abdicates. Intelligent people just as often as the unintelligent place their affections unwisely. And there is no greater agony than to love someone with all your heart, someone you know to be unworthy, and yet be helpless to free yourself. Time alleviates but never obliterates the scars of such emotional suffering; never do we forget those who have made us suffer.

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Love's power accounts for many peculiar relationships. One sees individuals cling to those who no longer love them, frequently even to those who abuse them. If love were under the control of the will such unions would be speedily terminated; but, alas, they cannot for the time being sever their emotional bonds.

Often married people seem mismated; they differ in temperament, education, tastes, ideas and ideals, and yet despite these apparently irreconcilable characteristics they achieve a plausible harmony. While such people may have many interests and ideas not mutually shared, they do have in common at least one point of interest; it may be only an instinctive attraction, but it is sufficiently powerful to keep them together.

Look around and try to explain to yourself how certain individuals ever found a mate. You wonder how anyone ever came to marry such an unattractive and peculiar person. It seems strange to us who do not love them; but not to the lover, whose life would be devastated with the loss of his partner.

Nature always has her ultimate purposes, with no regard or consideration for the suffering involved to the individual. Nature is never interested in individuals, only in people collectively.

Love, like God, is no respecter of persons or with the worth of an individual. Hence it is not uncommon to see unworthy people the recipient of deep affection. This is not because the loved one is worthy or capable of inspiring so much devotion;

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but it is due to the great capacity of the other to love. That is the secret of all great loves—the capacity to love, and not the worth of the recipient.

Love is the theme for all great music, literature, sculpture and painting. Love inspired the conception and construction of the world's most beautiful building—the Taj Mahal. Everyone who has seen it has marvelled at its sublime beauty; has felt it to be different, apart from all others in the world. True, it was built for a mausoleum, but it is not death one thinks of when contemplating its beauty. One thinks of deathless love and eternal marriage.

"What therefore God hath joined together, let no man put asunder," has been interpreted by some theologians that man has the power to undo the work of God. Divorce is man-made and puts asunder only carnal marriages. "What God hath joined together" NO MAN can separate. Man can only put asunder what he or the flesh hath joined together. What God or love hath joined together are forever one. Divorce separates only those who are physically mated, never those who are spiritually married, for the twain are one. Surface marriages are as naught compared to the holy tie of spiritual matrimony.

True marriage, or soul affinity, is the realization that man and woman have no actual existence apart from each other; that they are, in fact, counterparts, without which their separate lives are imperfect and unformed. Neither man nor woman can enjoy anything alone; they need their other half

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to share their joys and sorrows and make their life complete.

Life is dual, and love, true soul-love, is the bond of union which reunites the severed parts. The bond exists independent of personal charms or mental endowments. It annihilates self and selfishness; prefers the beloved beyond all else; survives through sickness and health; through good or evil report; lives for the one beloved, dies and realizes heaven only in the union which death may interrupt but cannot sever. Divine spiritual affinity survives death and the grave, unites the two, and in eternity perfects the dual nature of man and woman, companions for eternity.

Lives are made or broken by marriage; lives are permanently altered by marriage whether the union be temporary or permanent. When marriage is entered lightly and severed carelessly, usually both parties are deeply wounded and lose some of their idealism through this experience. Neither emerges from the situation as they entered it. And their affection instead of being a living and beautiful thing becomes ashes, and bitter ones at that. Often people value material possessions more than love and affection. They guard and insure them against accident, fire, loss and theft; on the other hand they let their marriage die for lack of love and understanding.

Some erroneously regard marriage as synonymous with bondage, and assume that their liberty is relinquished with marriage. There never was a

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greater mistake. In true marriage both parties have more freedom than out of it. Married, many people rise to heights they never would have attained if single. One marital authority truly says: "There's nothing you can do outside of marriage that you 'can't do in marriage—and do a lot better."

Everything in life has its price and love is no exception. But unlike most other things love is always worth the cost—which is pain. Love and pain are inseparable; one cannot be had without the other, for eventually death will impose a temporary separation. If, however, one realizes that the separation is only temporary, it will ease the agony of parting and enable one to bear the loneliness and to look forward with absolute certainty to reunion.

"Shall we meet those we love when we die?" Most assuredly we shall. All those we loved on earth we shall see again. Where there is love there is no death, for love is of the Deity. No way has ever been found to kill real love; that which perishes is not love but a counterfeit. If you have ever loved anyone, loved their very soul, you have never ceased to love them. Love is like the soul, it is eternal and does not experience death.